Life is one big adventure in not-knowing. We can’t guarantee that what we expect to occur will do so. But we live as if we could: we take what occurred in the past as evidence for the future and make our plans around it. That’s comforting, and often helpful.
But at certain junctures there’s no looking away from uncertainty. It can be unexpected, if you lose a job or are diagnosed with a disease. It can also happen during predictable transitions: when you graduate, your youngest child leaves home, your aging parents need more of your care.
Uncertainty Feeds Worry
When I was in high school, I had an unconscious, rather superstitious belief that I needed to worry, otherwise bad things would happen. I spent many hours worrying about all the things that were important to me, trying to keep the world turning. In the meantime, life taught me that worry is a gushing energy leak.
But when faced with uncertainty, with so much out of our hands, it’s hard to do anything other than worry! We turn things around and around in our minds, our guts cramping at the thought of each new undesired outcome and we search for ways to push things in the direction we want them to go.
Pragmatism in the Face of Uncertainty
There’s another way, though. I call it being pragmatic about the uncertainties in life. That means taking a deep breath and deciding to look at things as they really are, right now.
It means asking: what I can do, concretely, so that things go the way I prefer? And doing those things.
Rarely does that suffice, though, the uncertainty continues. So the next question is if there’s any unfinished business. Does the discomfort come from some avoidance or willful blindness? If so, what concretely, practical things need to be done to take care of that business?
Sometimes, that includes forgiving ourselves for things we can’t change anymore. That can require some spiritual practices, and a wise friend or a coach can be helpful here.
What Do We Know?
And after all that work, the uncertainty is still there.
We don’t have supernatural powers to make things happen the way we want them to. In fact, we don’t know if what we want to happen is even the best possible outcome.
So now we release the attachment to knowing what’s best. I might use Tapping and the set-up statement: “Even though I really believe that I know what the best outcome here is, I love and accept myself, and give myself permission to release that belief and be open to greater wisdom.”
Sitting With the Discomfort
Even after all this, the uncertainty and the discomfort that come with it are still there. It’s time to sit in it, let it become familiar, open up to its fertile gifts. One way to do that is to do a soul journey into the feeling and ask what gifts are there and what more is required.
But simply sitting, preferably outside, in the energy and shade of an old and well-rooted tree can suffice.
And… Uncertainty Remains
And still the uncertainty and discomfort are there.
What’s left is to acknowledge the feelings and send loving, positive energy (in my case, in the form of Reiki) in the direction of the people and situations involved, including ourselves.
And then, focus on something else that feels live-giving. The mind is like a hungry animal, always looking for something to feed it, so give it something constructive that can be positively affected with concrete actions, or at least something interesting that could potentially lift the spirits, including watching an engrossing show or chatting with someone. This could look like distraction, except for all the work already done.
It’s a lot of work, and the uncertainty is still there, but all the work moves the heavy energy and opens up to fresh energy. The discomfort continues, but we relate to it differently and conserve our life force and our sanity as we deal with reality.
Even when there’s nothing apparent going on, uncertainty is part of our lives. We can ignore it for the most part, but our feelings are still present and leaking our energy under the surface. So take this invitation and the sacred space we create with our shared intention and let the feelings rise to the surface of your consciousness. Let yourself sit with the discomfort and notice if there are any of the steps I describe above that would liberate some of your energy. Perhaps you want to tap on opening up to greater wisdom, and let yourself feel that energy come rushing in.
What energy moves out, and what moves in? What new insights arise?
Please share with me what you learn from this invitation and this method, you know I love to be in sincere connection!
If you are new to Tapping, I invite you to schedule a complimentary strategy call to get support to learn, and if we have worked together, feel free to check in about your set-up statements or even schedule a free quick connection call to catch me up. I look forward to connecting!